In the comedy Groundhog Day, hapless weatherman Phil Conners endures the same dreary winter’s day, over and over, presumably for years. Some see in his story a metaphor for spiritual awakening; until Phil learns to treasure and live each day as it comes, he is doomed to endlessly repeat it.

With the New Year—as millions of Americans resolve to lose weight, stop smoking, get out of debt and be more fabulous and fulfilled in every aspect of their lives—you may feel a little like Phil. You’ve made the same promises to change, year after year, maybe even decade after decade. In essence, you too are living the same day, over and over. And over.

Now you’re starting again. It will last a few weeks. Then you’ll jokingly pretend that you never really expected to change. You’ll pretend it doesn’t matter. And next year, you’ll repeat the same discouraging cycle.

You’re not alone. Without a real plan, a firm commitment and enough grit to get you through the rough patches, most New Year’s resolutions will be forgotten by Groundhog Day.

So what’s the secret to sticking with your resolutions? It starts with one simple realization: There is no secret.

Seriously, who doesn’t know that losing weight requires eating less and moving around more? Who is really stumped about how to save more money, or spend more time with their kids?

Lasting change first requires a decision. But we’re talking real decisions now, not the kind of hasty or wishful declarations so many of us make on January 1.

And once you decide, you must plow through, relentlessly, despite every temptation and obstacle. Want to drop 40 pounds or quit that pack-a-day habit? Half-hearted efforts won’t get you there. Though you’ll stumble and fall many times along the way (anticipate setbacks and plan for them), your initial decision must be based on genuine commitment.

Ready to make it great in ’08? Here are 10 tips to get you going—this time for good.

1. Assess your willingness. Tell the truth: Are you really prepared to change? If not, hold off on the big resolutions. Making and breaking the same promise year after year—like vowing every Monday to start a diet, then not doing it—is hazardous to your all-important sense of self-trust. Never kid yourself. It can lead to self-doubt that seeps into every area of your life.

2. Don’t start now. Want to lose weight? Success coach Doug Price, author of the upcoming License to Change, says January may be the worst time to start. “Health club memberships spike about now, and most regular members know to stay away until Valentine’s Day. Why not make yours a birthday or first-of-spring resolution instead?” As you plan, remind yourself—like a mantra—that you’re in it for the long haul, not a quick fix.

3. Change something else first. Put that monster goal on the back burner and make smaller changes. This gets you used to the idea of change, and also gives you a sense of self-mastery. One self-confessed “slob” launched a series of major life changes simply by resolving to tidy her apartment before she left for work. She took so much pleasure in her newly pristine place—and so much pride in herself for making the change—that she got excited about phasing in other changes.

4. Plan to fail. The road to success includes countless speed bumps. You fall off the wagon, sneak a smoke, wolf down a half-gallon of chocolate chip Haagen-Dazs. Decide in advance how to handle those inevitable setbacks. When you slip up, be as forgiving with yourself as you’d be with a friend, or your child. Says Evie C. Tomasello, of Tomorrow’s Wellness Center in Hammonton, “Many people feel that a setback means they blew it. They need to remember a setback is only a setup for a comeback.”

5. Don’t let yourself off the hook. Yes, cut yourself some slack when you don’t adhere to your plan. But don’t be flabby in your resolve. Exercise your resistance. Like a muscle, it will grow stronger with use. Experts say you have to stick with change long enough to get the payback. If you’re working out, for example, you’ll be encouraged by the improvement in your health, the changes in your clothing and your newfound energy. All people have slips and regressions, but if you recognize your health is improving, you have the foundation for lasting change.

6. To make it last, take it slow. Mark Twain said, “Habits are not to be thrown out the window, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.” If you set the bar too high—declaring you’ll work out an hour a day when you’re already overscheduled—you’re doomed from the outset. Set a more attainable goal, say, to fit in a 20-minute walk at lunchtime. Says Tomasello, “Spartan regimens are counter-productive. But you can do anything in moderation.”

7. Don’t eliminate bad habits—replace them. You’ve vowed to stop smoking this year. Great! But know that your body and mind will fight you all the way. You’re not just chemically dependent, you’re dependent on a whole set of physical actions (lighting up, repeatedly moving hand to mouth), and you associate smoking with specific situations (you have a cigarette after breakfast). You’ve got to create new rituals. Knit. Chew gum. Walk. Brush your teeth. Take up the five-string banjo. Again, hang in there until your new action becomes habitual. Tomasello says it only takes three days to get rid of a craving; experts suggest it takes about seven weeks to install and internalize a lifestyle change.

8. Share the vision, and include incentives. Are there three people in your office or circle of friends who want to lose weight? Start a Biggest Loser club that includes a cash prize. (For 10 weeks, everybody throws $5 into the kitty. Winner—make that loser—takes all.) This adds two strong motivators to your plan: the support of others, and a built-in reward. Maybe you can even get your company to sponsor the effort. “You’ve got to hold yourself accountable with someone other than yourself in order to see it through,” says Doug Price. “Get others involved with helping you change.”

9. Factor in some self-indulgence. Some diet experts now advocate a weekly “day off,” when dieters eat anything they want, guilt-free. Tomasello has a novel suggestion: dieting (or practicing any other positive behavior) three days a week to start. “Try dieting Monday, Wednesday and Friday, and keep adding on,” she says. You’ll feel less deprivation, and you may even start to look forward to your “on” days.

10. Learn to love it! Don’t face your resolutions with a sense of dread or duty. Reframe your thinking, and change the language you use to describe your plan. Instead of whining, “How come I have to do this? It’s no fair! I don’t wanna!” say, “I don’t ‘have to’ do anything. Today, I ‘get to’ run my own life and make it better! Aren’t I the greatest?”

Scared Straight

Motivational guru Zig Ziglar once asked, “If you had a million-dollar race horse, would you let it stay up all night, smoking, drinking and overeating?” The answer, of course, is a resounding no; most of us wouldn’t treat a potted palm the way we treat our own irreplaceable bodies. If you wouldn’t abuse a horse or a houseplant, how can you habitually burden yourself with excess fat, toxins and inertia?

You’ll often see Dr. Mehmet Oz on the Oprah show, displaying the actual organs of people who died of heart disease, lung cancer and other largely preventable ailments. If we could only see what poor diet and other bad habits do to our insides, we might think twice about polluting them.

Educate yourself about the risks associated with inactivity, excess weight and smoking, including the risk of heart disease, stroke, sleep apnea, diabetes, hypertension, cancer, early signs of aging and a shorter lifespan.

If you can slow the progression of chronic disease, you can slow the aging process in a way. Lifestyle changes don’t constitute a fountain of youth, and you can’t turn back the clock. But you can slow it down by eating more healthfully, adding activity to your routine, and cutting out nicotine.

The Dog on the Porch: A Fable about Change

A man was sitting on his front porch, the family dog on the floor at his side. A neighbor stopped by to chat, and noticed that the dog was moaning in its sleep.

“What’s wrong with old Rover there?” asked the neighbor.

“He’s sleeping on a nail,” replied the man.

“Why doesn’t he just get up and move?” asked the surprised neighbor.

The man looked at his dog, who moaned again, and said, “I guess it doesn’t hurt enough yet.” Moral of the story:

Most change occurs when you’ve had enough of the pain.

You say you want a resolution?

Here are the top 10 New Year’s pledges.

1. Lose weight.

2. Start exercising.

3. Stop smoking.

4. Stop drinking.

5. Find romance.

6. Spend more time with family.

7. Spend less time online.

8. Become more organized.

9. Pay down debt.

10. Be a better person.

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