In the 1980s, Princess Diana’s wedding gown set the standard for lavish romanticism, and brides of the era quickly followed suit.

The dress, by English designers David and Elizabeth Emanuel, was a frothy meringue of ivory silk and tulle with full gathered sleeves, a voluminous skirt, 10,000 handset pearls and a 25-foot train. (The veil, by contrast, was quite simple, as was Diana’s hair: a becoming bob beneath a diamond coronet.)

It was a beautiful, unforgettable dress; not so the fads that followed it. For years thereafter, everyday brides tried to outdo Di with enormous dresses, the fussier the better. Unlike the princess, they often topped them with elaborate headpieces, until the whole getup looked like something out of the Mummers Parade. Then they dressed their bridesmaids in similar (but multi-colored) gowns and dyed-to-match shoes, and photographers were on hand to record the whole fashion misfortune.

Luckily, all things must pass. By the 1990s, the super-sized post-Diana dress gave way to the sort of simple, elegant profile popularized by designers like Vera Wang.

That silhouette persists today. Brides have discovered that when it comes to your wedding day, elegance often trumps extravagance, and originality beats conformity.

Tesi Miteva, owner of Tesi’s Bridal Boutique in Ventnor, says deep jewel tones of burgundy, red and claret are most popular among this year’s bridal attendants. That changes if it’s a wedding at or near the beach.

“A lot of Jersey girls get married in Cape May, at yacht clubs, and at places like the Flanders Hotel in Ocean City,” she says. “Especially in spring and summer and especially at the beach, they’re looking for fabrics like chiffon, and colors like ocean blue and Bahama breeze.”

This year’s great silhouette is the “mermaid” style, which hugs the body from the bodice through the hips to about mid-calf, where the skirt flares out. (Like Barbie’s “Solo in the Spotlight” gown.)

“It’s a sexy look with a little more fit and flare,” says Miteva.

But if you have an ample figure, you may want to choose another style, because this one actually adds curves.

For bridesmaids and mothers of the bride, suits and cocktail-length dresses are overtaking gowns as the popular choice. Tina Conklin, of Wedding Belles Boutique in Linwood, says many brides these days are selecting a single color—magenta, coral, blue, even black—and letting their bridesmaids wear a number of different styles in the same hue. Great idea (but make sure the colors match)!

Here are some trends you’ll see at weddings this year, courtesy of the Wedding Channel, bridal magazine The Knot, and local bridal consultants.

• THE HALTER NECKLINE. For several years, the strapless dress reigned as the most popular style among brides-to-be. It may be displaced this year by the halter, which also showcases a woman’s back and bosom, but does away with the fear of northern exposure. Cap sleeves are also pretty, as is the “tip of the shoulder” neckline, also called a Sabrina or bateau.

• THE LAYERED OR TIERED LOOK. Lots of layers flutter as you walk, and give your gown movement on the dance floor. “It’s a soft silhouette, and very forgiving for the less-than-perfect figure,” says Conklin. So you can relax, and eat!

• LUSH LACE, FAUX FLOWERS. The Wedding Channel’s Spring 2008 Couture Show included plenty of lace and silken flowers. The shapes are contemporary, but the details are sweetly old-fashioned, giving you the best of both worlds.

• SPARKLY ACCENTS. Three-dimensional elements that add texture are “very hot” right now, says The Knot. For example, a gown recently featured on Good Morning America had a satin skirt, a jeweled sweetheart bodice and embroidered flowers on the skirt.

• COLOR. A wedding dress these days need not be virginal white; some brides are choosing silvery lilacs, blush pinks, butter yellows and other hues for the big day. If you like the traditional white, dress it up with a splash of color in a sash, bow or embroidery. (But the bride who wears black may rue the day she chose such a funereal color. One fashion icon who wore black on her big day—Sarah Jessica Parker—has said she regrets that bold decision.)

• THE BIRDCAGE VEIL. When Reese Witherspoon wore one in Sweet Home Alabama, she started a revival of the vintage veil that continues today (Priscilla Presley also wore one when she married Elvis). A birdcage is made of openwork netting that covers just the face. It’s an elegant alternative to the traditional long veil, or you can wear one to the ceremony and switch to a birdcage for the reception. Birdcage veils look great with a pillbox hat.

• REMOVABLE TRAINS. Go dramatic for the wedding. At the party, shuck the caboose and dance. For a wedding on the beach, choose a sweep train (it barely brushes the ground, so you’ll gather less sand).

• ONE WEDDING, TWO DRESSES. Says Conklin, “A lot of our brides are wearing a traditional ball gown to the church and changing into a sheath or a short, fun cocktail dress to the party.”

Word to the Wise Bride

Decide your wedding dress budget before you try on dresses, and resolve to stick to it. About 10 percent should be set aside for gown, accessories, shoes, etc.

Wedding Dress Do’s & Don’ts

• DON’T LET FADS DICTATE YOUR WEDDING STYLE; what seems chic this year may look hopelessly dated in the years to come.

• DO THINK “TIMELESS.” Imagine poring over your wedding album 20 years from now. Will you love or hate your choice of gown, hair, veil and accessories? Classic silhouettes and simple lines are a virtual guarantee that your style will endure. (Hint: Think Grace Kelly or Audrey Hepburn, and you’ll do just fine.)

• DON’T STRIVE TO BE SOMETHING YOU’RE NOT. Your wedding is not a masquerade ball; your goal should be to look like the loveliest version of yourself. If you typically prefer a natural look, for example, why not wear your hair loose, with a few tendrils caught up in diamond clips, instead of trying for a lacquered up-do?

• DO BE KIND TO YOUR BRIDESMAIDS. Choose a dress that complements every figure, is suitable for wearing again, and does not break the bank. Have you seen 27 Dresses? Even Katharine Heigl looked silly in that Scarlett O’Hara-at-the-Twelve-Oaks-barbecue gown. For friendships that last, don’t make your girls wear ugly clothes!

Selective Boldness

If you're wearing upswept hair—a French twist, Juliet knot, chignon or similar style—drop earrings can add drama. For short hair, pearl or diamond studs are popular.

Don’t overdo it—your wedding day is not an excuse to pile on. If you wear sparkling chandelier earrings, forget the necklace. Too much jewelry makes you look “gussied up” and overdone.

Are you wearing a backless dress? Consider wearing a lariat necklace that cascades down your back. You’ll look sensational coming and going. But keep the earrings minimal.

Makeup, too, must be applied judiciously. Says makeup artist Maria Viso, of Picture Perfect Makeup, “You can go for a natural look in the daytime, or a dramatic effect for an evening wedding, but you never want to look too made-up. The whole idea is to look like yourself at your most beautiful.”

Flowery Sentiment

Here come the bridesmaids: one in yellow, carrying a sheaf of calla lilies; one in red, with a nosegay of red roses; and one in peach, holding a spray of vibrant Shasta daisies.

Here comes the groom, sophisticated in black with a white gardenia boutonniere.

Finally, here comes the bride, with an arrangement of periwinkle Vanda orchids.

Get the picture? At the contemporary wedding, the flowers—from bouquets to boutonnieres, corsages to centerpieces—don’t have to be identical. It’s more fun and certainly more colorful to mix it up.

Big colors this year: plums, blues and lavenders in monochromatic arrangements. Cascading bouquets and hand-tied French twist bouquets with pearls and ribbons also make a dramatic statement. The most popular wedding flowers are calla lilies, Casablanca lilies, gardenias, hydrangeas, lilacs, lilies of the valley, orchids, roses, tulips and stephanotis.

Bridal Traditions

Strange meanings of our most durable traditions

• THE ORIGINAL PURPOSE of a bridal party was to fool evil spirits. The bride’s friends dressed like her in order to confuse any malevolent entities.

• IN ANCIENT TIMES, when men sometimes kidnapped women into marriage, they recruited their strongest friends to help them fight off the bride’s family. Thus began the tradition of the best man.

• IN ENGLAND, women used to try to rip pieces of the bride’s gown and flowers to “steal” her good luck. To escape from the crowd, the bride would toss her bouquet, then run off. Today the bouquet is tossed to single women with the belief that whoever catches it will be the next to marry.

Reel Love

Top 5 romantic movies (and a few cheesy classics) Want to get in the mood? These romantic movies are made to be watched with someone you love.

Really Romantic:

Two for the Road. Audrey Hepburn and Albert Finney are splendid in this bittersweet story of a passionate but often-troubled marriage. Thankfully, love prevails, and you’ll adore the wryly happy ending. The exquisite score is by Henry Mancini.

The Quiet Man. John Wayne has never been more appealing (or sexy)! He plays Sean Thornton, an American ex-pugilist hiding a painful past. He goes to Ireland to start anew, and there finds love with the fiery Maureen O’Hara.

Bridges of Madison County. In the capable hands of Clint Eastwood and Meryl Streep, the super-cheesy bestseller by Robert James Waller was transformed into a touching tale of love and loss, duty and regret. Stock up on the Kleenex!

Sense and Sensibility. In this faithful retelling of the Jane Austen classic, Emma Thompson is a spinster trying her best to live without love, even as her strong-willed sister (Kate Winslet) pursues it at every turn. In the end, everyone wins.

The Way We Were. The combative chemistry between star-crossed lovers Barbra Streisand and Robert Redford ignites this love story, set against the worldwide turbulence of the 1940s. Though their happy ending proves elusive, this may be the ultimate romance.

And the Golden Cheese Ball goes to:

An Affair to Remember. After a shipboard romance, Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr agree to ditch their lovers and rendezvous six months hence at the Empire State Building (er, this is after he stops being a gigolo and starts being a famous painter). But she gets hit by a bus on the way and, plucky girl, vows never to tell him she’s paralyzed. He starts drinking and takes another cruise. Boy, do these kids need counseling!

Love Story. Poor but plucky Vassar girl falls in love with bazillionaire Harvard lad. His bourgeois parents disapprove, so the young sweethearts vow they will live on love alone. Alas, poor Vassar gets sick and expires. Harvard cries a single tear. This is sodden sentimentality at its best, with a wooden Ali McGraw as the doomed Jenny, and that cloying string-filled score.

Sleepless in Seattle. Pay no attention to the absurd plot of this three-hanky tearjerker about a plucky widowed dad, his annoyingly precocious son and the ditsy journalist who loves them (even though she doesn’t know them). Concentrate instead on the uncomfortable feeling of your heartstrings being jerked right out of your chest, twisted into a knot, and gnawed on by beavers. (What a coincidence—these guys end up at the top of the Empire State Building too!)

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